Advice of a Medical Nature

Practically all illnesses are transmissable and contageous, and can be caught by inhaling air exhaled by an aflicted person. To avoid becoming ill yourself, simply carry around a pocket handkerchief.

The simple procedure of applying a piece of cloth over the nose and mouth, enables breath to be cleansed prior to inhalement, and prevents the bacteria from being absorbed into your lungs.

Among the many diseases that can be avoided by this practice are...

Cholera
The Plague
Lepracy
Black Death
Tinitus




If you are afflicted by any soreness or skin inflamation, visit your local medical practicioner. They will be able to assist in most cases by applying leeches on and around the afflicted area.

The leeches draw out the bad blood, leaving nothing but healthy blood, ensuring you a speedy recovery.

When making enquiries about leech-certified practices, ensure you visit a reputable and medically qualified doctor, as there are a few who acquire their leeches by disreputable means...



Even with all the recent medical advancements, diseases of the eyes are still hard to treat. A trip to your local medicinal emporium would be best, for a consultation with the pharmacist. They stock many medicines nowadays, and will soon have your blindness under control.



In cases of soreness of the mouth, I recommend a visit to the local dentistry. Tooth removal is considered safe nowadays, and takes just a few minutes. You can even get to keep a souvenier of your visit, if it remains intact during extraction.

Added:  Monday, July 23, 2007
Reviewer:  ColonelK
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hits: 313
Language: eng